http://www.mailehernandez.com "Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up." - Thomas Edison - "Well-behaved women seldom make history." - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich Mon, 06 Sep 2010 18:17:14 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en Interesting night last night. I went exploring around my new neighborhood.  I felt myself kind of flagging later in the evening, so I decided to try to perk myself up by going to AJ's and getting some healthy and overpriced food.  I went to the one at Baseline and Val Vista, ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=584 Well.  In two days it'll be the seventh, which marks the four-month anniversary of the creation of this garbage dump of a situation I've been in. And I think the tide is turning, just a little bit. Let's not get all excited and throw a pinata party.  I'm not walking around the ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=583 Well, hey, I'm out of work early today and not quite sure what to do with myself, so I guess I'll just do a random blog. I have a total girl-crush on Dr. Jan Garavaglia, of "Dr. G: Medical Examiner."  I just think she's the coolest.  She's what I always wanted ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=582 I've been struggling with what is appropriate to say in a public(ish) arena.  There are things you can't say when any Joe Blow can read what you say. But here's what I guess I'll be honest and say. It is NOT okay. If you ask me how I am and I say fine, ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=581 Last night I went over to Alyssa's for a little while, just to hang out.  Since she's just a walk away I brought nothing to her place but my keys. We were just watching TV and all of a sudden she gets this urgent desire to go to Wal-Mart. The problem was, ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=580 While I like to fancy myself a writer, I'm not much of a poet. A friend sent me this poem, and it is so spot on that it's scary. Please Be Gentle By Jill B. Englar Please be gentle with me for I am grieving. The sea I swim in is a lonely one and the ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=579 Of course, this would be the next thing.  The attack of the self-doubting memories. Long before there was a Max, a Conrad, or law school, there was just me and my own strong but muddled ambitions. I was in Singing Hoosiers in college.  We were preparing for a concert and at one ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=578 Obviously, woke up on the wrong side of the bed yesterday. Rough, rough, rough week on the whole.  And when it culminated in twelve hours of nightmares about Max dying, only to wake up, feel the momentary relief of realizing it was only a dream, and then have the real-life nightmare ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=577 I know now what Hell is. Even my onetime friend, sleep, has turned on me.  I spent twelve hours having nightmare after nightmare, watching my son die over and over, in a myriad of ways.  Kissing his pale face goodbye.  When the dreams weren't about that, they were about the loss ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=576 Yesterday I got off work early and got home about 4:30. Immediately that feeling which is becoming so familiar settled in.  The blackness so dark that I couldn't escape it. I shoveled in some food.  I keep thinking it's going to give me the pleasure it once did.  It never does.  But ... http://www.mailehernandez.com/?p=575